I'm so irritated. Everytime I'm home, I feel so carefree andlazy but everytime I'm in school, I feel so stressed & just want to run away...

My life is nothing right now but a fight with my conscience to study. Other than that, it's pretty boring. Except when I sleep. When I sleep, I dream. When I dream, I'm free. When I'm free, I'm happy...

"I'm not following you. We just happen to be going the same way at the same speed." ~ Neopian Times

.

My friend so funny. We were in the canteen eating and got to the topic of mothers and she said, "My mother sucks." Then she looked around & said, "Oops, is she around?" Then she sighed, "I meant for her to hear it."

If anybody ever listen to other people's lives at home, it's horrible. Some mothers actually pull the hair of their children till it feels like falling of for a whole week. Some of our closest friends experience hell at home. I feel so sorry. I never get to experience those kind of things. My parents have never really canned me or force me to do something. Maybe in primary school lar but still not as bad as other people. Sigh...

"I always thought I would follow you up to the gates of Hell if I had to. And that, once arriving there, I would beg the gatekeeper to take me instead of you. And if he must take you, I would ask to come with you. And if he would not let me come with you, I would wait for you on the shores of the river." ~DV

Lalala. I'm bored...yeah, I'm supposed to be studying...lalala...should I really be a doctor? I wanna get married by 24...so how? If I don't get married then...Singapore's birth rate will continue going down...heh, am I really worried about that? Haha.

I'm getting bored of red. Seriously (Sirius is dead! Waaah!), my favourite colour is actually silver...it used to be white because it is plain, clean and pure...but I took a stupid test which says those who like white are old-fashioned...oh well. I probably am. But then all colours are nice...each one is unique and just as beautiful as any another...yupz.

"It was hot in the filament. The energy got me out." ~ physics lesson on CRO

Clark Kent is such an idiot. I feel so so sorry for Lex. How could Clark leave him like that? Why can't Clark even thank him? Argh...the jealousy and everything. It's not fair that Clark has everything and Lex doesn't. It is sooo not his fault. Why must life be so unfair?

Oh, oh, Indonesia is showing Charm again! And I can't believe Cole is still crazy over Phoebe. If Cole just kills himself, than he'll make Phoebe happy. But did he do that? Nooo...he had to come back to life and go after her just to be with her for the rest of his life. And Phoebe is pregnant. Finally! A baby, yeah!

Just look at me. Everybody else is studying while I'm still watching teevee. When am I going to prove myself to my family? This is so not working...

"Oh, give it up, Harry," yelled Draco in exasperation. "Is there somebody else?"
Harry banged his fist down so hard on the bar that the glasses rattled. Draco was conscious of the fat wizard on his right giving them a peculiar look. He was also conscious that his last question to Harry might easily be misunderstood if one hadn't carefully listened to the conversation previously. Oh well.
"There is nobody else!" Harry shouted. "There never will be anybody else, not for me, not ever!"
The fat wizard nudged Draco in the ribs with his wand. "I think he really means it," he hissed in Draco’s ear. "Come on, give him another chance."
"Oh, shut up," said Draco, not turning around.
~DV

Yeah! I've finished my prelim orals! I'm sooo glad it's over. Though I did not do good in it. I was too...dull. I wasn't like engaging during the conversation and my tongue slipped over the word "upset" and I almost forgot to make eye contact! Oh sigh...I feel so bad...but I guess I have to move on...

Moving on to the case of having a library fine of $10.40. It was so stupid! I actually borrowed out a book from the reference section. I didn't pay the fine (are you nuts?) 'cause it was just a mistake. Gosh...$10.40...my mum would've killed me.

Oh wait! I just remembered Tissina! She was the first person being oralled and probably made a damn good impression...calm down, girl. At least it's OVER.

"You want to do stretching just do stretching. Or you can massage your ears." Guess who? (Maria Ho, duh)

Orals tomorrow. Yeah.

So Superman is finally going to learn how to fly. Must not miss the next show. And why oh why must Lex turn over to the dark side? So SAD!

They were advertising this CD during Friends and Smallville last night and they keep playing this stupid song over and over again -- actually only one phrase -- and now it's stuck in my head:

"I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you"

Just got back from SS remedial. It wasn't that bad. I don't even know why I dread it. I always dread SS, Geo and Bio. Scared they call me to come up and start asking why I never do well. And Bio is supposed to be easy too. Bleagh, I feel stupid things. My idioticness just kills me. And I felt so stressed when I reach school today. I feel that I'm more stressed in school than at home. When I'm home, I can relax so much and procrastinate all the way until the next day and realise I havem't done a single thing and so wake up at 4a.m. to do homework and sleep again at 5. Very nice.

Hope I did okay in English. Hope eli did okay.

"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, and then throw it in the face of the person who gave you the lemons until they give you the oranges you originally asked for."~Draco Veritas.

I hate my father. I hate him for hurting me like this. Gosh, his words can be so hard...or maybe I'm the one who's so weak. He always tells me to do my best. I guess he really wants me to go for it. Probably expecting me to go RJC. And I'm gonna break his heart when he realise that it is false hope. Sigh...I am such an unfilial daughter...I mean, I actually slept the whole of Saturday...20 hours or sth. It's amazing how much we can sleep. And I'm not even tired. Just LAZY. Such a horrible word. Especially at this time of the year.

Oh, I guess my blog is bloody red isn't it? And it hurts like hell, doesn't it? It irritates people and glares at people and makes them squint away...red is so evil...Guess it's time to call Jiawen again. How much do you want me to pay this time, Jiawen?

"If you don't start persisting from now, how are you going to get there?" Ummu Choo.is

I'm procrastinating. And I actually hate it. Okay, who am I kidding? I can't do this. I have to start studying.

Anyway, do you know that chocolates can make you happy? Then your body will produce endorphins and so your emotional state of mind will be happy and peaceful...ah...but try not to eat too much as it is quite addictive and can burn a hole in your pocket, which will make you emotionally insecure...not to mention physically insecure... Anyway, do you also know that chocolates contain chemicals that are fatal to dogs? Interesting...

Oh question: how do we make our blog password-prove. As in, whoever wants to read it have to type in password? Like what Pam did?

"Why do you keep writing my name?! I'm not from 4/2!" Eli, Vic and co at the sign up sheet for swim comp. (Imagine their squelling voices...no offence...)

Hello. I am not depressed. Of course I'm not. I'll just be regretting later on in life. Ah well, that's later. I'd rather procrastinate and enjoy now. My parents don't really care anyway...

Oh, Mrs Tan YH gave us chocolates today...I can't believe it. She's so damn nice. I LOVE her...although she was quite fast today during lesson.

"You waste so much money you want people to smell you, right?" Tan YH (lesson on alcohol and perfume)

We went for dinner at Suntec yesterday but we had difficulty finding a halal restaurant. I felt so freaking guilty cuz I'm the only malay...I am so irresponsible & never take initiative to find a halal restaurant in Suntec before...Inever go out often anyway...sigh...I hate this...oh, yesterday was the last day I'm going to go for any Red Cross function. Yeah! I'm gonna miss it, sure...but I can't wait to move on!

Listening compre was okay. Dunno y I feel so confident I can get all correct. I hate that feeling. Everytime I feel it, I'm sure to get almost all wrong...

“Suatu renungan untuk sebuah bayang:
Kemanisan hanya dapat dirasakan
setelah puas kepahitan dinikmati.”

Yeah, I just had my EM loci class test and I didn't have time to finish it. Again.

I think my blog looks okay already. The stupid background keep coming back then disappearing again. Ah well.

"This one happen to strike lottery" ~Mrs Tan Yioe Hwa (during practical I think...)

New blogger? Ha. So funny...

I've just been told that I can take 105 without crossing the street, then drop at Toa Payoh & take 8 from there to go home. 40 min. Man, I feel so stupid. I could have saved 20 min from each day, that would be 100min for each week, 400min for each month and 4800min for each year...

So, yeah, I took 105 with sham today and ended up wasting half an hour acting like tourists, taking pamphletes and loooking through it because...we kinda got lost. And it was raining too...

It wasn't that bad lar...I guess we have to make a few mistakes before we can reach our goals...

Malay 'O's orals were bad...I might just get another merit...I had been aiming for distinction...ugh...& they asked abt our impian...aim in life I think...& I crapped about being a doctor (which will be almost (just almost) impossible), but I don't even know what the hell I'm supposed to be when I grow up...

Hmm...my blog page looks funny...& I don't even know how to work all this html stuff...umm...help?

Oh, OOP was great...I miss Sirius already...I can't stand Rowling, how can she do that? She'll probably make Harry be killed by Voldemort in the seventh book then all the good people will die then Voldemort will stand there laughing then suddenly Fawkes will swoop down and kill him with fire-breath or something...umm...yeah...

And...in DV, Draco slept with Hermione...not Ginny...but I bet he will soon...that two-headed freak...

Why do I sound like I'm hating everything? I don't, really...I just find things so...not exciting these days...I'm not even worried about the 'O's...yet. Maybe I will, maybe I won't...I dunno...I just can't be bothered to study...I can't care less about anything these days...but I don't see anything wrong with it...don't tell me that I'll regret later on 'cause I know I will...but there's just something stopping me...and I'm happy it is...

"Rush headlong and hard at life
Or just sit at home and wait.
All things good and all the wrong
Will come right to you: it's fate.
Hear the music, dance if you can.
Dress in rags or wear your jewels.
Drink your choice, nurse your fear
In this old honkytonk of fools."
~The Book of Counted Sorrows by Dean Koontz