Kaimisuki

Scary. What is with all the people nowadays? Some are jumping for joy. But most are sniffling & feeling depressed, for those who did badly & also those who get 80+%. Hate my life. I told my father I'm becaoming rebellious & I like it. Is that throug? I do not know. I say it just because I didn't know what else to say. Damn. Even Shamiah has a blog. The sound of the typing of the keys. I should be studying right now. I hate myself. The bottom of my mirror broke today. Now I'm going to have 7 years bad luck. What the hell. Like I care. I thought my whole life is already cursed. Have I mentioned I hate my life. Hey, I did this during HML class:

A story I was writing
A story I'll write now
A story of a little girl
Who had no feelings at all

Friends she has
Laughter she enjoys
But one thing she's missing
Is not loving the life she's living

Why? she keeps asking
Wishing she knows
What's wrong with me I wonder
Couldn't be the Monday blues

Hate my life
That's what she feel
Jealousy & hatred
That's what she feel

But it's wrong, isn't it?
All the burning anger & fear
Why can't I be like them?
The ones I admire?

Tears flowing down her cheek
While the anger course through her veins
Clenching, unclenching her fists
As she stares at the past she had

Once a long time ago
She had dreamt to be the perfect girl
Once a long time ago
She had hoped as she revolved around the world

Later...
She's lost & lonely
Without the hope by her side
Later...
She doesn't want to live
She wants to hide & let everything die

But that is wrong, isn't it?
The feeling of dying
The feeling of givng up
She wants to continue living
For the sake of keeping it up

God, please help me
If you are even there
I'm loosing myself
I need someone's love & care

The love did came
The hugs & kisses
But she pushed it all away
As if she doesn't deserve it

It's just wrong
Weird you can say
How can you hug someone
Who you've never seen before?

Lost again she felt all week
Her grades are going down
Her parents are weird to her
Her sisters do not care for her

She sat by the seaside
As she tried to figure it out
But time would never let her
Time just grabbed her as it passed by

Lying on her bed that night
Wondering what was wrong
But something else happened that night
Something she had never longed...